As I reflect back on 2009, I see that I have had many questions. Why did this happen? Why isn’t this happening? And I observe a pattern of me thinking and thinking and spinning my wheels asking many questions but rarely finding an answer.
The psalmist confesses that he finds himself wrestling with his thoughts. And he finds two things happening. One, he complains that God has forgotten him? And two, he thinks his enemy is triumphing over him. This is the predicament of an overactive mind asking all kinds of questions and the the frustration that ensues when the answers don’t come.
There are so many questions that will go unanswered on this side of eternity and I am slowly coming to the realization that it is not my right to demand that God gives me satisfactory answers according to my timetable. If I insist on getting answers, then my life will be a lifelong wrestling match in my thoughts. And this wrestling with no end in sight will often lead to certain frustration and spiritual defeat.
That is why God gives us an alternative. Instead of thinking and asking question after question, God says, trust me. The psalmist acknowledges that we live in a world where unanswered questions abound. But in the midst of personal frustration over the endless wrestling match of thoughts and multitude of unanswered questions, he makes a startling realization. Life is not about getting an answer to all the whys of life. Life from God’s perspective is learning that trust is far more valuable than being able to tie up all the loose ends and arrange the strewn puzzle pieces. God wants us to be able to say that we trust him even when the evidence suggests that we pack up our bags and throw in the towel.
Trust is unnatural. It is much easier to reason and rationalize and figure things out. But God knows that this path will only lead to frustration and despair. Trust relies on God’s timetable to reveal truth gradually, one answer at a time. This Christmas, God gave us the the greatest present — Jesus Christ. He is the incarnation, the full revelation. To know Christ is to know enough about what really matters in life.
I want to know Christ this coming year. And I pray that it may be a year of asking fewer questions and greater trust.