“I was reading something my wife wrote for a blog the other day. I thought it was insightful (as usual) and I thought it would be encouraging for all of you to read. So here are some thoughts from my wife…”
The Lord has been dealing with me on a certain issue lately. Of all the refinement I have felt and seen in my walk with God (although plenty still remains), this issue seems to rear its’ ugly head again and again. I can’t seem to “kick it” entirely and so, once again, I am faced with my weakness and need for the truth of who God is.
The issue is fear. Not the healthy biblical fear of God that should put everything in perspective for us. It’s the unhealthy kind. The kind that can end up crippling us as we go about trying to follow Jesus WHEREVER He calls us.
Sometimes these fears are drummed up in my own imagination. Other times a seed grows any time someone exclaims, “You’re going to do THAT?” or “I could NEVER do that!” which is why I find it so important to really know God and to be able to trust Him.
There have been many times that my husband, in his crazy (and well-founded) love for God, has brought a “scary” proposition to the table. I have always been very committed to his leadership, but sometimes following his lead has caused me to really examine what I believe about God.
It “tests my theology” as I heard one pastor put it. Do I really believe that if we “seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, all these things will be given as well”? (Matt 6:33) Am I confident that our treasure is not here on earth, but that it is in heaven? (Matt 6:20) Is it true that every day that was ordained for us was written in His book before one of them ever came to be? (Psalm 139:16) Well, then, that makes my fear about safety seem kind of silly, doesn’t it?
The other day we were praying together as a family about an upcoming two-month trip out of the country. My second daughter, Mercy, was getting emotional as she prayed about her fears, when my 5 yr old son leaned over and whispered to her, “Mercy, the Lord your God is with you wherever you go”. You know my mama’s heart was filled up to hear that.
But to meditate on that scripture was very powerful. God is with us wherever we go. “You hem me in behind and before, and lay Your hand upon me.” (Psalm 139:5) We may, as ministry wives, be separated at times from our comforts, our security, our friends, our riches, our expectations, but we will never be separated from the presence of God. We may struggle through those fleshly fears, those fears that take our eyes off our glorious God, but we cannot let them overwhelm us.
I will not let fear keep me from experiencing all that God has for me, and all the ministry that God has prepared for me to do. I pray the same for all of you sisters! “Humble yourselves therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time He may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you.” (1Pet 5:6)